Musings: The Kind of Love We Crave For

I remember reading this quote a long time ago –

“Unless it’s mad, passionate, extraordinary, give it up. There are too many mediocre things in life. Love shouldn’t be one of them.”

I don’t know who originally came up with this quote because I got it off one of those quotable boxes that we see floating around on social media. I remember sharing the quote with some of the closest people in my life. While one had wholeheartedly agreed, the other reasoned that not always does love have to mad, passionate or extraordinary. Maybe love is just the quiet voice at the end of the day that whispers sweet nothing into your ears. Maybe love are the arms that hug you tight when you’ve had too long a day and all you want at that very moment is to sleep.

I wonder then, why do we place so much emphasis on something that would come across as so…for lack of a better word…ordinary.

Maybe it’s us who has made love such a complicated thing. Because unfortunately we live in a world where it’s easier to find sex, than it is to find love. Because if you swipe right and you match, you might just have found someone to cure one of your lonely nights. I wonder then, whatever happened to good old fashioned romance?

Apparently, it’s a dream world that I live in – if I want someone to make me feel special for a change. I know that Prince Charming isn’t going to turn up at my door with a shoe I lost, proclaiming his love for me at the stroke of midnight. But I also know that it’s completely reasonable to want someone who would make an effort to remember you even during the busiest of days. Life could have turned upside down (and no one is denying the fact sometimes it gets hard to even catch your breath), but it takes about five seconds to text someone to let them know you’re fine.

We live in a world where you are going to give your undivided attention to someone until you become sure about where you stand. Once you know that the person might like you back, you easy into comfort. You begin to take the person who is supposed to be one of your priorities for granted. And the said person wonders what on Earth went wrong from one day to the next. The said person worries too much about everything because they’re overthinking and trying to make sense of an extremely screwed up situation. I wonder if someone took them by the hand, took them to a corner and whispered the golden rule of the Universe to them – You can never be honest about your feelings. Because once they know you might really like them, they’re going to stop making you feel as special as they once did.  

We live in a world where you might be in love with someone but it’s unacceptable to tell them how you feel because, well – love is considered to be weakness. The most acceptable thing to do is pretend that you’re interested in seeing them but never ever let them know how you might truly feel.

I grew up watching epic love stories unfold before my eyes. And I refuse to believe that only a select few get to enjoy such a beautiful experience. 

When did love become so complicated? When did everything I used to know, and believe in completely fall apart? Where did the kind of love that we crave for completely disappear?

And who on earth rewrote its definition as something that’s extremely complicated and convoluted? Why do I need to apologize for wearing my heart on my sleeve? And, please tell me why do I have to pretend to be okay with someone who clearly doesn’t seem to return my feelings?

Love isn’t weakness. It’s one the rarest and the most beautiful things that you can actually find in this mediocre life of ours. People seem to have forgotten the charm that timeless romantic classics brought to us.

In the end, love is nothing too complicated. Perhaps all love really means is two people who constantly choose each other over and over again – above everyone and everything else.